Joely Sue Burkhart

Behind the cut.  No warnings on this one. 

P.S. Don’t forget about the Book Giveaway for Sydney Croft’s Riding the Storm!

Letters in Chronological Order

First letter
Second letter 

Dear Dr. Connagher:

I’m getting married tomorrow. Everyone keeps asking me if I’m excited, and I try to be. I care for Richard. I do.

But he’s not you. And I can’t have you, can I? I lost you nearly a year ago. A year without any phone call or e-mail from you. I’m not that hard to find. But then again, neither are you, Professor. I saw on the Drury website that you’ve been tenured and was voted most popular teacher in the entire Arts Department. That doesn’t surprise me at all.

Lord knows I loved you.

So you might wonder why I told this man yes and not you. Quite honestly, he doesn’t scare me like you did. You looked at me without saying a word and I felt the weight of your will pressing on me. I felt a surge of desperate need to do exactly what you wanted, just to see you smile. Walk across broken glass? Sure. Give up everything I am? Okay. Just touch me, hold me, call me darlin’ in that smooth Texas drawl, and I’m yours, heart and soul.

That’s what I would have been like for you, and I know deep down, that’s not what you wanted, either.

Richard doesn’t have that kind of will. He’s safe in a way you never would be.

It’s hard to tell since Daddy doesn’t talk real well, but I get the impression that he’s not too thrilled about my choice. Odd, considering Richard’s been his assistant for years. I thought he’d approve, but he looks at me and I can hear him repeating his favorite sayings and shaking his head.

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it; if it is broke, fix it right the first time.

That first time would be you, Conn. The first time I loved somebody so much I wanted to die. How can I fix that? How can I make it right between us? I can’t. You crossed a line I didn’t even know existed, and I went, simply because you asked. There’s broke, and there’s broken.

You and me, well, we ain’t so easy to fix, are we.

But here’s a little secret just for you, Conn. I’m afraid maybe someday I’ll hate Richard because he’s not you. I think I’ll hate every man who’s not you.

~ Rae

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