And I’m not ready!
What’s left of my sanity insists that I should probably skip this year, but I want to participate so bad. I love the challenge, the thrill. I can almost hear the frantic thundering of keyboards all over the world when the clock strikes midnight on Halloween. It would kill me to miss it…and it might kill me to participate.
As the lack of blog posts shows, my writing mojo has been on vacation for awhile. Part of it is wearing the many other hats of a writer with releases coming out. Victor is out and about wielding that wicked crop and I can’t help but worry about how he’s doing. How people are receiving him. He’s meaner and harder than Conn, which could work against him. Who knows.
Meanwhile, I’m still battling Vicki, their youngest sister. You’d think that the baby of the family would be a piece of cake to pull off, but she’s harder than her brothers put together. I was talking with my friend Jenna yesterday in my daily check-in with her, and she recommended trying tarot to see what my hold up is. Am I blocking myself? Why can’t I finish Vicki’s book, which I’ve been working on off and on all year?
I got several telling cards: the hermit, Death, 9 and 3 of Swords. Ugh. Take a look at some of those and tell me this book isn’t killing me?!? Yet then I turned the Wheel of Fortune, too, and the Ace of Cups. My cup overflows. What goes down will always come back up. The wheel of time turns…
Basically, what I came awaywith from the exercise is that I’m in a transition period. Old habits and patterns are dying. I’m growing in new ways that aren’t always comfortable. Vicki is entirely character and relationship driven. There is no plot, not really. I had a suspense subplot I was going to work in, but the story doesn’t need it. It would just take away from the constant emotional battle between three people trying to find their way to a compromise that will make everyone happy. Every day is a battle: emotion, need, denial, love, fear. No wonder I’m exhausted.
But NaNoWriMo doesn’t pause for emotional trauma. It’s not a month I can spend weeks trying to get through an especially emotional sex scene. So I’m probably going to do the multiple project attack. I have two novellas (20K, 30K) and a post-apocalyptic (targeting around 60K for first draft) in the hopper too, with various amounts of worldbuilding and plotting done. I’m spending this week to get as much plotting completed on any and all projects while I chip away at Vicki.
Surely between 4 projects I can find 50K.
Braver woman than I am. *hugs*
I’m on the fence about NaNo, though I did update my page a bit. Best of luck to you!
I am doing NaNo this year, beacause I can’t NOT do it. But it may kill me as well.
On the other hand, isn’t NaNo about working to deadlines and doing the improbable? In that case, this is the type of situation NaNo was made for. (Either way, this November scares me.)