Top Five Reasons I Should NOT Be Cooking Thanksgiving Dinner

This is a true story of how my first day off this week from the Evil Day Job has gone.

1. I’m behind on NaNoWriMo.  Waaaaay behind.  But I haven’t even opened Word or Scrivener yet today.  I have too much organizational, cleaning, prepping, etc. to do.  For example…..

2.  I wanted to move my granite-top kitchen island to be more convenient for prepping, but it’s tight quarters in the eat-in kitchen (and my kitchen is too small to use it as an “island”).  I huffed and puffed it into the spot I wanted, moving the table and chairs as I needed.  Unfortunately, I knocked over Middle’s bean plant she started at school that was precariously situated on the window sill.  DIRT ALL OVER THE TILE FLOOR and down in the grout.

3. Grumbling, I went to get my broom.  It wasn’t in the pantry.  I also couldn’t find my dustpan.  Fifteen minutes later, I found them in the garage.  ?? No idea who took them to the garage.

4. I began sweeping up the dirt.  WHEN I KICKED OVER THE DOGS’ WATER BOWL.  Now I had mud in the grout.

5. After sweeping up the mess, I took my soggy broom out to the deck to get as much dirt off as possible.  I whacked it on the railing and BROKE MY BROOM HANDLE.  (Honestly, I wasn’t that mad.  Not really.  I guess I don’t know my own strength.)

I am now making my first batch of homemade yogurt in my new yogurt maker.  (Why I have a yogurt maker instead of all the dozens of other ways I’ve TRIED to make yogurt without an other useless appliance deserves it’s own blog post.)  I’m also making two loaves of homemade bread today and roasting chickens this afternoon (so I can make my own broth for the dressing and noodles).

PRAY THAT I DON’T BURN DOWN THE HOUSE.