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NaNoWriMo 2014 Day 5

My two oldest monsters both needed my laptop last night for school.  Of course they couldn’t use my old/backup laptop That Man uses.  It had to be mine.  So I didn’t get much done after 8 PM, when I can usually scrounge out a few more words and set the next scene.

Luckily/unluckily the scene I’m in is a MAJOR BDSM/sex scene that will take days to get through.  It’s so brutal.  Physically.  Mentally.  Emotionally.  I’m exhausted just thinking about it. But it’s the major candybar/midpoint scene.  Everything from here is a whirlwind of reveals and secrets and spiraling doubts/fears.  Hopefully I can pull it all together.  And no, as much as it kills me, I can’t share any of that scene here.  It will spoil everything if you know too quickly.  🙂

Still managed 2238 words yesterday for a total of 8850.

“You’ve been hiding, denying what you are.  Denying what you need.  So I have to ask, who hurt you, Ranay?”

My fingers convulsed tightly around his but he didn’t complain at how hard I squeezed.  He lifted my hand and lightly kissed my knuckles, and then he placed my hand on his chest over his heart. I fisted my hand in his shirt, but I didn’t try to jerk away from him.  I knew what he was going to do.  I wanted it.  Even though I feared it.

His fingers settled beneath my chin and he tipped my face up to his.

I didn’t even close my eyes, although the intensity of his searching gaze made my chest seize up so hard I was afraid my heart would burst with effort.  It felt like my blood had turned to concrete in my veins, cold and hard and heavy.

“Talk to me,” he whispered, his voice achingly gentle despite the command.  “Tell me what happened.  I need to know so I don’t make the same mistakes.”

I could feel his will reaching into me, stretching out like seeking fingers through my mind.  I blinked rapidly, not fighting the feeling but trying to adjust.  It was like my body temporarily forgot how to function on its own.

“When you give yourself, you give all the way.  You don’t hold anything back.”

I managed to nod a little, still not able to find my voice.  He pulled away enough to get my glass and gently lifted it to my lips so I could take a drink and at last I was able to speak.  “Some men can’t handle that.  It’s too much responsibility.  Too… creepy.”

He narrowed his eyes at my word choice, the first time he’d ever let me see displeasure.  It wasn’t a look I cared to earn again.  “It’s not creepy.  It’s not too much responsibility, either, if the man is dominant enough.”  He lowered his voice and leaned in close enough his nose almost touched mine.  His eyes were searing dark pits, sucking me under.  “And I promise you, Ranay, I’m dominant enough to handle you.”

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NaNoWriMo 2014 Day 4


Graphic courtesy of Lynn Viehl.

I made it Dark and Early this morning, “meeting” my friend Diana Castle for some words.  I had over 1,100 words from that session, but lost my lunch to errands.  After work today, I sat in the parking lot waiting on Middle to finish up basketball (it was a looooong wait tonight), and was able to get another chunk.

I’m hoping for a little more tonight but I’m fighting tired eyes.  We’ll see.  I’ll go ahead and update my count now so whatever else I get will be for tomorrow.

1813 words today, 6612 total.


“You give off a confusing vibe, Ranay.  I have to be sure.  I need to know what’s inside your head so I can decide how to proceed.  Do you know where I’m going with this or am I going to make a fool of myself tonight?”

I wrapped my other hand around the glass to make sure I kept my hands to myself.  “I know I’m submissive.”

He let out a low chuckle that made me clench my thighs together.  “That’s not even close to the signals you’re giving me.  Saying you’re submissive is like claiming the weather in Missouri is a little changeable.  Meanwhile one day it’s seventy degrees and I’m running after Sheba without a coat, and the next day I’m shoveling my driveway and cursing the ice.”

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NaNoWriMo 2014 Day 3



Graphic courtesy of Lynn Viehl.

I had big plans for this week.  I was going to get up Dark & Early at 4:45 a.m. so I could write a good solid hour+ each morning this week.

Then someone monkeyed with the alarm on That Man’s side of the bed (no one has taken credit.  I mean blame).  The first time it went off was around midnight.  It went off again shortly after that.  Then he got a work call at 1 AM.  And another at 4 AM.

Needless to say, I didn’t get up on time today.

However, I didn’t have to drive all over everywhere after school today, and we’re having pizza for dinner, so I had this niiiiiccce long stretch of time to write today, plus my lunch.  I was able to get my total word count up to just under 4800 words!  Woot!

Even better, things are getting really dicey in Charlie’s story.

I always like to share a little when I’m deep in the flow of story, but there’s over 40K story from what I’ve shared here before and what I’m writing now.  Lots and lots of story to choose from that’s not anywhere close to what I wrote today.  Plus there’s a huge reveal that I don’t want to spoil.  So I’ll try to keep the deep dark secrets to a minimum.

He pulled down two wine glasses from the overhead rack and led the way into the living room.  Great, now I had to figure out where to sit on the sectional without being too obvious.  If I sat on the far side of the L, I’d be able to see him from anywhere but it might look like I was afraid of him.  I didn’t want him to think that.  Nor did I want to plop down beside him and give him the impression that I was easy pickings.  I am, but I don’t need him to know it.

I’d rather sit on the floor any day, especially if I could curl against his legs.  But that certainly wasn’t an appropriate first sit-down-and-talk position.  Did other people have such incredibly ridiculous difficulty deciding on something as easy as where to sit?  He sat in the middle of the sectional and set the bottle and glasses on the table in front of him, yet I stood frozen, unable to make a simple decision about where and how to sit.  I tore my gaze away from him and stared at the floor, willing the tears in my eyes to go away.

“I won’t bite,” he said amicably.

I risked a quick glance up at his face, horrified that he might actually think I was afraid.  He winked at me, flashing that disarming dimple, and patted the couch beside him.  And I went to him, relieved and yet even more upset at my own inability to act like a normal human being.  I didn’t say anything while he poured the clear wine into the glasses, barely more than a splash in each.

“I have to drive to the airport so I can’t indulge.  But I can’t resist sharing your first glass of good wine, either.  If you don’t like it, I won’t be offended.”

I took the glass but didn’t sip it yet.  I tried to sit calmly, like I sat and chatted with people all the time.  Not like I was a wreck, waiting for him to tell me what to do.  My stomach was in knots, afraid I’d been wrong about him and yet dreadfully sure I wasn’t.  I wanted his commands more than anything, but I’d tried so hard to pretend that everything was okay, too.

He leaned back and propped his feet on the table, careful not to knock the bottle over.  He wore heavy black motorcycle boots that I found just as intriguing and unexpected as his backyard of cows.  He drove a boring beige Buick.  Thousands of them drove around Springfield every day.  Yet I was pretty sure none of the men inside probably wore heavy black boots with buckles and studs.  It made me wonder what kind of surprises he hid under that black turtleneck.  Tattoos?  Piercings?



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NaNoWriMo 2014

I haven’t visited the site yet to make it official, but I do plan to participate in NaNo this year.  However, I’m already behind, and I don’t have the surplus of vacation from the Evil Day Job as in other years.  The only days I’m currently scheduled to take in Nov. are the week of Thanksgiving.

I like to stay up until midnight after Halloween and get the first day’s words, but it just didn’t work out this year.  Having the first days on the weekend are difficult for me.  That’s when we do all the errands and stuff that we don’t have time to do in the week because of work.  Plus, yesterday we drove to Papa’s for a bonfire.  I did manage to get 519 words in the car on the way, but that’s it.  Today’s laundry and Princess had a party and football, which can make it hard to concentrate.

If I finish the night with a total of 2K for the first 2 days, I’ll be happy.

Then I plan to get up D&E starting tomorrow and keep pushing forward.

Oh, and the story I’m working on?  I guess I’m technically a rebel because this project was already started.  I intend to finish the first draft of Charlie’s story this month.  I already have 40k+ on it, and I think I’ll need another 40K at least.  It’s a long, detailed story with lots of snaky twists and turns.  I already have it thoroughly plotted out, so hopefully it won’t be too bad.

That’s my plan for NaNoWriMo.  Are you participating this year?

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Camp NaNo

I’ve never joined a cabin before, but this year I’m going to Camp along with Raelyn, Nicole and Diana.  My #1 goal:  finish the PNR.  I don’t care how many words that is, whether 20K or 50K.  I just want this done so I can get it submitted.

So I can work on the next billionaire book (which I finally got a hilarious title for – I hope they let me keep it!) and the plantation story and Mal’s book…

Sigh.  I have so many things I want to do this year!

So it’s time to get busy.

Anyone else ready to make some s’mores and tell some ghost stories around the fire?

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NaNoWriMo 2013 Day 4

Saturday morning, the two youngest monsters had their first non-Upward (more competitive) basketball game.  Ugh, to say it didn’t go well is an understatement.  We ended up spending at least an hour at the court later in the day practicing a few things just the four of us.  Then I took Princess and Littlest to my favorite coffee shop, Classic Rock, and we worked.

Two cappuccinos and about an hour and a half later, I had 1380 words.  Not bad considering I had two kids with me, but short of my daily goal.  I didn’t sweat it since I’d broken 2K the day before.

But then Sunday was almost a total bust.  I had the “I don’t wannas” and wasted away my day.  I knew I had Monday off, but I still had to get kids up for school.  Middle in particular wanted to get up at 5:30 am the next day, so I couldn’t stay up late.  I ended up scratching out a couple of hundred words but they weren’t good and it wasn’t pretty.

Monday morning I had to take Princess to school (late start on Mondays) and ran by Wal-Mart to pick up a few things. So I was late getting started and again, it wasn’t looking good.  I just couldn’t make myself focus.  I’d write 10 mins or so and then find myself looking up, wondering random things, opening up a web browser only to forget what I was going to go look at.

I made myself go down into my office.  I started up my aromatherapy diffuser, turned on my little space heater, put on my most inspiring NatureScapes music (drums and crows), and set a timer.  15 mins only.  I couldn’t do anything but write for 15 mins.  Then I stopped and got up, walked around, filled my water glass, etc.  Then another timer.  After I finally broke 1K for the day, I did a little exercise, ate lunch, and then met my friend Diana Castle in the Coyote Con chat rooms to do some more sprints.  Then I met Raelyn Barclay over her lunch (in Vegas, how cool!) via text and we did another sprint.  By then, I had several thousand words and it was time for me to pick up Princess from school (band practice).

I got one more later “sprint” in just me with the TV going in the background, to bring the day’s count to 4526 and my NaNo total to 8362.

If I can get another nice chunk of words today, I’ll be thrilled.  I need to check in at work and the kids are home today (voting day).  I also have to take Princess back to school today for All District tryouts.  Hopefully I can still get my words in!

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NaNoWriMo 2013 Day 1

I love to take Nov. 1st off when it’s a weekday so I can stay up until midnight 10/31 and hit the ground running!  Unfortunately this year I was so tired that by the time midnight rolled around I could hardly string two words together.  I did manage 576 but then called it a night.  The words were slow going and it was going to be after 1 AM before I got enough to call it quits, and I had to get the monsters up for school this morning (wakeup call at 6 AM).

Once I got everyone off to work and school, I had a lazy few hours.  It was nice to sit and drink coffee in silence while dinking around with email, Twitter, and TV.  At least I didn’t turn on Netflix (my ultimate time sink) but I enjoyed watching Ancient Aliens.  Finally about 9 or so I turned off the TV, shut down internet, and got to work.

It was still slow.  I’d write a bit and pause, check my word count.  300 words.  Sigh.  But I did finally break 1K and stopped for lunch.

This year, I’m going to try and walk every day, weather permitting.  KoKo needs the work (long story, I’ll try to write up a blog post later) and I don’t want to totally chain myself to the computer.  I’ve been stressed out lately and I need the exercise!  So I walked around the neighborhood a little over 30 mins with the pup and came back just in time to write another 30 mins or so before the first two monsters got home from school (early day out on Friday).  That brought my total to 2025 words for the day.

I ended up taking the rest of the night off.  I’m mentally still a little out of the game so I don’t want to strain too hard yet.  I was hoping for 5K but I’ll take what I got and hope for the best tomorrow.

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The best laid plans…

I allowed 9 days of vacation in November, concentrating on the beginning of the month to get as many words in as possible early, and then the entire week of Thanksgiving (since we host the family).  I was so excited to FINALLY have some time off…

Then I received word that a crucial person at the Evil Day Job for my current project gave her notice.  Her last days in the office are next Monday and Tuesday… when I’ll be out.  So I halfway committed to logging in at least a little those days to maximize the time I have left with her.  Not too bad though – I could still write in the mornings.

Then this week I got notice that they need me to travel to St. Paul home office for training.  The week of Nov. 18th.

Sigh.  I’m going to lose the entire week.

I can say I’m going to write that week, but I know how it’ll go.  I’ll be up super early (I’m not used to having to dress and put on makeup for work since I work from home) and I’ll be out late catching up with friends.  I won’t even have my lunch to write because I’ll be doing lunch with friends.  I’ll also be half brain dead because I’ll be frantically preparing training materials (I’m giving part of the training and I don’t have time to prepare the training until after a crucial milestone testing file for my project is done by 11/15).

Oh not to mention my story is only halfway plotted in my head (I was going to push hard to finish the PNR).

I am still going to try.  I love NaNoWriMo.  But it’s not going to be the perfect/fun month I was expecting.  What about you – are you joining the insanity this year?

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NaNo Day 0

NaNoWriMo has defeated me this year.  It’s just not going to happen.  Between another Evil Day Job project that must be complete by the end of the month, hosting Thanksgiving and all the cleaning and preparation, and Sig’s obstinance, I haven’t even opened my file in several days.

I lost momentum last weekend.  We drove to Granny’s for an early Thanksgiving, and my brain decided to take a vacation.  Literally.  I’ve been on a mental holiday since.  I’ve played a lot of games and had my nose to the grindstone at work all week.

On the home front, I’ve cleaned the complete pit of a basement, thrown away tons of trash and broken toys, stacked a huge pile of toys to donate, cleaned the fridge, re-organized my two pantries, and gathered a stack of small appliances to either sell on craigslist or donate.

This weekend, I still need to go through the kids’ clothes, donate what they’ve outgrown, put away all the summer stuff, and drag out the winter clothes.

The carpet cleaners are coming Monday.

The turkey’s thawing in the downstairs fridge.

I have a huge Thanksgiving prep spreadsheet going.

Hopefully the week’s break from Sig has let my subconscious churn a little on where I want to go with Sig’s story.  If I can finish the first draft this year, I’ll count it a huge victory, even if I’m nowhere close to hitting 50K by the end of the month.

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NaNoWriMo Day 008

In which I fall behind…

I only got 800+ words election night.  Last night was even worse.  I still have hope for tonight, but man, it’s slow going.  The words just don’t have any life.  I know the plot, the characters, everything, but there’s just no energy and vibrancy to the words.

I just have to keep going.  Keep pushing.  The magic is there.  I just have to find it.

On the bright side, I’m off tomorrow and Monday.  Hopefully I can make up some lost ground.  Total (before tonight’s work):  10,996 words

Snippet (still not NaNoWriMo material):

Bloody hell.  She’s brought us to a sex shop.

Sig gritted his teeth, sure his face had exploded in fire.  He shot a subtle look at the other man to see his reaction.

Studying the chains and clamps, Masters whispered, “I guess my handcuffs aren’t enough for her any longer.”

A surge of fury and shame swept through Sig so viciously he trembled.  “Enough for me, you mean.  Is that what this is about?”

Masters arched a brow at him.  “I have no idea what the lady’s about.  You know her better than I.”

Do I?  Shaken, Sig slipped closer to her so he could overhear her quiet words to the young woman running the back counter.  He tried to be invisible, making himself small and thin and dark, barely even breathing.  But the young woman’s eyes flickered his way and she gave him a small, knowing smile.

“Very good,” Charlie said.  “May I try a few to make sure I select the correct grip?”

“Of course.”  The shopkeeper pulled down several short-handled crops and flails.  “These look to be the best length for your arm and height.  This one,” she pointed to a flail with thin tails of cloth, “delivers the softest blow.  This one uses beads and leather to deliver more pain without the same cutting strike.  Which do you think will suit your needs best?”

Charlie chuckled softly.  “I don’t honestly know.  I’m afraid I’m a novice at all this.  However…”  She trailed her fingers over the braided detail of the leather flail.  White cording made an intricate webbing about the black leather.  “I find this design the most interesting.  What do you think, Sig?”

“I despise it.”  His lips felt so tight that he could barely speak.  “Why would you even think I’d like such a thing?”

She tilted her head, her eyes wide with mock surprise that made him quiver with rage.  “Why on earth would you assume it’s for you?”