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Amish Friendship Bread Experiments

That Man brought the dreaded gallon-sized bag of goo home from work the other day.  You know, the one you have to feed every 5 days and try to dump several bags of new goo on your friends and family.  Eventually they all start running in the opposite direction because they don’t want anything rotting on their counter.

So I end up doubling recipes, making tons of cake that none of us need.  On the bright side, it doesn’t tempt me at all, but the girls sure don’t need a bunch of rich cake to eat every day.

Besides, it’s always bothered me to put a box of artificial pudding in “Amish” bread.

So I googled and found all sorts of recipes that use the Amish starter for REAL FOOD.  This site had tons of recipes (both with pudding and without).  I had no idea that there were so many options!  Not just sweet stuff, but pancakes, biscuits and breads — anything where you’d use sourdough.  The Amish starter has a cup of sugar in it (each time I feed it), but I figure after 5 days or so, very little of the sugar is probably still there, although it’s definitely going to be sweeter than regular sourdough.

The first thing I tried didn’t turn out so well.  I made a chocolate cake using my fresh-ground whole wheat flour.  However, I don’t think I ground it quite fine enough, so the cake was a bit grainy and very heavy.  It also wasn’t sweet enough for the family, and not really chocolately enough.  They ate it, but it stuck around on the counter for days instead of disappearing.  Next time I’ll put chocolate chips in it, extra cocoa, and maybe a little more sugar.  I’m also getting better at grinding the flour.  I actually set a timer for a full 60 seconds in the VitaMix, because I just won’t grind it long enough if I don’t.

Tonight, we decided to have breakfast for supper:  pancakes and bacon, the monsters’ favorite.  I hardly ever eat pancakes, especially white flour ones made from a mix (again, family favorite is the “Pioneer” mix).  However, tonight they sounded really good.  I pulled out my Jane Brody cookbook and found my favorite multi-grain recipe (fresh-ground whole wheat and oats), but I tweaked it to incorporate the Amish starter.

At lunch, I put in 3 T of starter, along with the milk and flour for pancakes according to the recipe.  Mixed it in a bowl, and then set the whole thing in the oven with the light on to ferment all afternoon.  The recipe said to let it sit all night but I figured a couple of hours would be fine (although next time I’d probably use more starter if I didn’t have all night to let it work its magic).  Then for supper, I made the rest of the recipe like usual.

Man they were really tasty!  My favorite way to eat them is with a cup of no-sugar applesauce and a pat of real butter.  So good!

Have you ever made anything with the Amish starter?

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Slow Progress

But it is progress!

I’ve returned to Dark and Early, even if it’s only about 45 mins.  Since I start work at 6:30, and I have to help the monsters get ready for school between 6-6:30, I have to get up at 5 AM to get any kind of progress.  Needless to say, it’s haaaaaard to get up that early.  In 45 mins, I’m usually able to get 500 words.  That’s a start.

It’s netted me 7400 words in Oct. so far.  Not huge, but I’m getting there.  Even better – I’ve just about completed Act 1 of Lord Regret’s Price.  And even having it all plotted out, Lady Wyre still managed to surprise me — and her men — by dragging us into a sex shop in Zijin.

I’ve also rededicated myself to Weight Watchers, getting back into tracking.  (I was getting lazy.)  I also restarted Power 90 yesterday.  I’m hoping to stick with it until Christmas, and then move up to P90X in January.  *knocks on wood*  We’ll see, barring injury and Coyote Con and NaNoWriMo and the creek don’t rise.  I’m currently up 4 lbs from my all-time low.  Sigh.  But I know it’s going to go in the right direction now.

I have good news to share soon too.  Watch the Coming Soon page for details!

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Zombie Prize Updates

The $25 gift certificate winner has been notified.

Since I only had two entries on the Make Me Write the Book post, I’m going to keep that giveaway open awhile longer.  You’re making it too easy on me!  NaNoWriMo is just around the corner, you know.  I need to know the title, so I can decide so many other things about the book.

Like what’s the gorgeous red-head witch’s special gift?  Clare was a kitchen witch.  I need something unique and fun for the new book.  Any ideas?  Go over and comment on the giveaway for an extra entry!

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Review: The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch

SJ Collins of Raining Ink says:

WARNING: DO NOT READ WHILE HUNGRY…or do the smart thing and have snacks at the ready. This is a dangerous book for foodies!

The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch is my kind of fairy tale: fun, heart-wrenching, and sexy all at the same time! If there’s anyone  I know who can pull of a Zombie Romance, I had absolute faith Joely was that author. Joely Sue Burkhart’s books are passionate and rooted in the sacrificial nature of love, which makes for engaging and emotionally stimulated reading. Added with her unique ability to sprinkle light-heated humor, a healthy dallop of tantalizing sex scenes, fascinating characters and world building dynamics, it’s all apart of why she’s my go-to author for romance.

Thank you so much, SJ!

I’m still looking for reviewers.  If you’re willing and able to post a rating or review anywhere online, please drop me an email (joelysueburkhart AT gmail DOT com) and I’ll get you a review copy.

You can still enter the giveaway:  Make Me Write the Book – Part 1.

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Make Me Write the Book – Part 1

Great minds think alike – I see that Lynn Viehl is planning a similar blog event with Tell Me What To Write 10.

As part of The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch release this month (all proceeds in 4th quarter 2012 are going to Joplin Recovery), I thought it’d be fun if you guys get to help me decide what the next Zombie Category Romance should be.  (Caveat:  I have to finish Lord Regret’s Price before I can write this, but I’ll be using NaNoWriMo to work on both if need be!)  There are soooooo may fun titles to warp.  I mean, play with.

While I was searching for stockphotos for Yiorgos’s cover, I stumbled across an image that really spoke to me.  I knew I could do something fun with it in the ZCR world, but I wasn’t sure what.  The possibilities were endless.  So I decided to bring you guys in on the fun and let you help me define which story I would write.

The first step was to commission Silviya to create another incredible cover.

Oh, all that red hair.  That flirtatous attitude.  She’s planning something very, very wicked, don’t you agree?

No Greek tycoon zombie for her.  No, I decided she was involved with an Egyptian (or some made up Middle Eastern) mummy.

She’s even wearing a large ring.  I’m sure she’s the head of her family.  That means she’s a very powerful witch.

But again, the possibilities are endless.  What are her powers?  Is she cursing the hero… or is she going to break a centuries old curse and free him?  Is the revenge hers… or his?

You decide! 

First up, we’ll work on the title.  I have several possibilities in mind that I’ll list below.  Vote for your favorite by making a comment on this post before Oct. 15th (or feel free to write in your best suggestion in the comments).  The title with the most votes wins!

Prizes:  in two parts.

1. Anyone who comments will be entered to win a Hope for Joplin T-shirt I’m having printed by BigfishTees.  They raised over $170,000 for Joplin by selling these shirts!  I’ll ship this shirt anywhere in the world.

2. For the commenters who voted for the winning title, I’ll draw one name out of the hat.  You’ll be listed in the acknowledgements of this currently untitled book.

Here are the possible titles we can play with.  Again, if you have a better idea, throw it out in comments.  To vote, comment on this post with your favorite title!

1. The Merciless Mummy’s Revenge

2. To Love and Curse

3. A Passionate Curse

4. Beauty and the Mummy

5. The Vengeful Mummy’s Secret Baby

6. The Mummy’s Captive Witch

(Don’t forget, you can still enter to win a $25 gift certifcate too.)

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Zombie Romance Giveaway

Why am I so fascinated with zombie romance?

The first time I explored the idea of “undead” romance was several years ago in now-defunct Drollerie Press’s chat.  We always had such a blast talking about all things horror, and we got to talking about how hilarious it would be if someone wrote a zombie romance.

I mean think about it.  If someone’s dead, how can you possibly work out a HEA?


The challenge of it fascinated me, and then Deena threw down the gauntlet.  She challenged me to write one.  I accepted.   :mrgreen: That story is still available for free (click on the thumbnail to download a pdf, or other formats are available at Smashwords).

So I guess Zombie Category Romance was only inevitable.  I love the idea of warping traditional tropes.  That’s why I take Regency tropes… and twist them into Jane Austen Soap Operas where ladies rule instead of the men.  Now I’m taking billionaire alphaholes and making them zombies.

But it’s not easy.  I mean, to make it romance, there has to be more romantic elements than horror elements.  So there has to be a REASON for the hero to be a zombie, and it can’t be too disgusting.  e.g. no rotting flesh hanging off the bones while he eats braiiiiiiins.

So how could I come up with a zombie hero that’s not disgusting? That’s where the magical elements come into play.  Instead of a zombie apocalypse caused by a virus, the hero is simply cursed.  It’s not a widespread disaster.  There’s no need to hole up in a farmhouse with every gun you can find.

In fact, most of the time Yiorgos looks perfectly fine.  Only a handful of people know what happens when he takes off the signet ring he won from Emile Remy along with his restaurant.  He wears the ring the entire time he’s with Clare, except for one time she tries to use her powers to help him, searching for a clue to the curse.

He even eats normal food, not brains.  Which is a very bad thing for him, because Clare is a kitchen witch and she makes one mean chocolate cake.

So I came up with a few cheesy tag lines that were more jokes than anything.  My favorite that I didn’t use:

Come for the braiiiins.  Stay for the romance.

*laughs*  I promise.  NO BRAINS!

Remember all procceds in 4th quarter 2012 from The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch will go to Rebuilding Joplin.

To celebrate my first zombie category romance release, I’m giving away a $25 gift card to any online book retailer (AMZ, B&N, etc.)  Simply comment on this post by Oct. 10th midnight (CST) and tell me your favorite zombie movie.  This giveaway is open to anyone on the planet, even if you’ve won something from me before.

And stay tuned – I intend to giveaway several more prizes this month as we get closer to Halloween!

Anyone willing to review or rate The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch – email me at joelysueburkhart AT gmail DOT com with your desired format, and I’ll send you a review copy.  Thank you!

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Start Small

Even when you’ve been doing something for years, sometimes you have to start over at the beginning.

Baby steps.

As a published author with a full-time day job, I’ve been struggling to keep up this year.  Between extensive edits (I took several days off from work so I could complete The Bloodgate Warrior edits) and two releases on the writing side — and massive projects (e.g. a five-year project finally reaching closure) on the Evil Day Job side — I’ve been fighting mental exhaustion.  No, worse, spiritual exhaustion.

The endless blog hops.  Trying to come up with something new and exciting to say for every single guest post.  Diligently replying to every comment without just saying “thanks.”  Searching for reviews, which means I have to read them, good and bad.  And yes, even lukewarm reviews suck at the creativity, draining it dry.  Worrying about numbers.  Self publishing.  More worrying.  More planning.

Mental.  Exhaustion.

Not conducive for the number one thing a writer must do.  You know, produce WORDS.

The only brand new material I’ve managed to turn out this year is Her Grace’s Stable.  Now that’s sad sad sad.  Yes, I’ve been busy.  I went to my first ever conference.  I had a work trip (haven’t been to the home office in five years).  Three releases counting the zombie one.  It’s been a busy, full, crazy year.

But my pipelines are empty.  Worse, my creative well is absymally dry.

It’s so tempting to jump on a new shiny and fill my well with whatever energy that flits by, but I want to be a WORKING writer.  Someday, I’d like to have a contract before I finish the book.  The only way I’m going to be able to do that is if I stick to things I’ve promised, even if not yet contractually obligated.

So Lord Regret’s Price is on the docket.  Note: he’s been on my list all year.

How to start.  How to get over the hump when there’s nothing in the tank.  How to convince Sig to open up and give me something, anything, other than plot.  Because I need the emotion, whether it’s jealousy or rage, hatred or love, I have to get to the heart of what’s bothering him.

So I started small.  Using Scrivener’s goal tracking stats, I set my daily count to 250 words.  *wince*  Yes, I know that’s ridiculously small.  I gave myself permission to get those words on anything, no matter how bad and ugly they were, as long as it fit in Sig’s folder.  That was the catch.  I could brainstorm plot.  I could write up background.  I even wrote a first-person piece in Gil’s POV and decided he needed a POV in this story (I couldn’t give him a POV in Lady Doctor Wyre because he had too many secrets).  ANYTHING was okay, no matter how bad it was…. As long as it was for Sig’s book.

It felt good to see that bar go green.  And then I could stop, satisfied that I’d finally started.  250 words.  Done.  Goal reached.

Then the next day I got another 250 words.

And the next.

And suddenly I was writing again.  Really writing.  Not editing, not marketing, not tracking stats, not angsting over sales.  WRITING.  I bumped the daily goal to 500.  A pittance of what I can get when the muse is singing and the words are flying in the air, crystal clear and just waiting for me to reach out and grab them.

I’m not there yet, but I can do 500 words in one sitting again.

It’s like a muscle that’s stiff and sore and reluctant, but it is moving.  The muse is warming up.  Since I had Monday and Tuesday off from the EDJ this week, I reset that daily goal a couple of times.  I didn’t get anywhere near the wordage I wanted with errands etc. (Mom has a day off and I magically transform into a personal taxi) but it was a start.

I even set up a spreadsheet just for Oct with several “Sprint” columns across the top with daily and monthly totals.  Even if I can only get 250 words at a time, if I do that a few times each day, the words will start to add up.

I even managed to get up Dark and Early this morning — probably the first time all year.  I only had about 45 minutes, but I managed over 700 words.  Sprint 1 down for the day.

Even better, Lord Regret’s Price has somehow managed to break 5K.

Momentum is everything.  Start small.  Be consistent.  Build momentum.

Who knows.  Maybe Sig will be finished by NaNoWriMo as I originally hoped, and I’ll be in shape to start something new in November.

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Rebuilding Joplin

It’s been well over a year since Joplin was devastated by a massive tornado.  Clean-up crews worked hard for months just to clear streets and remove debris.  Many of the commercial sites (like Wal-Mart and Home Depot) have been rebuilt, but some residential areas are still empty.

Lot after lot stretching out in the distance with just some concrete pads.

Why?  Because many areas of Joplin just weren’t that affluent.  When people lost everything, they simply packed up and left instead of rebuilding.  Many lower-income apartments were completely leveled.  The good news:  many new apartments and duplexes have been built.  The bad news:  most of them are no longer low income housing.

They might look great, but the people who used to live there can’t afford it.

We took a trip last month to take new pictures of the area.  All procceds in 4th quarter 2012 from The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch will go to Rebuilding Joplin.

When we lived in Joplin 1990-1992, we lived in an apartment on this once BUSY street.  I wouldn’t even recognize this area now if I didn’t have the street signs for reference.  The entire apartment complex and exercise facility behind it are gone.

This is where our favorite grocery store used to be.  It’s still just an empty parking lot.

This is where the high school used to be.  It’s an enormous hole in the ground now, and the students are using a large department store at the mall in the meantime.

This is all that’s left of the original high school.

This tree manages to break my heart and yet sing with hope at the same time.  You can tell from the broken branches that the tornado killed it and nearly twisted it completely out of the ground, yet it managed to hold firm.  Now painted in vibrant designs, it stands in a completely empty lot and promises that the heart of Joplin still beats strong and sure, despite the broken branches.

I’ve blogged about Mythos many times, and after I was assured my beloved sister was okay, my next thought was for Mythos and all the people we know there.  It’s almost like God drew His finger along Rangeline and jumped across the street…. to spare Mythos.  The tornado managed to veer just enough, destroying everything (including large Wal-Mart and Home Depot buildings) across the street.  There was some minor damage to the pillars outside, but the restaurant and the people we know there were spared (although the owner was INSIDE Wal-Mart when the tornado hit).

The monsters love Mythos as much as we do.  And yes, in my mind, Remy’s in The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch might look just a little like Mythos.  I hope I captured the same delicious food and warm, welcoming atmosphere of our favorite restaurant!

(Yes, they DO have Death By Chocolate Cake on the menu!)

 

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Happy October: Zombies are Here!

The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch is live at Smashwords and should be up at B&N and Amazon shortly (I’ve submitted them, at least).  If you click either on the link or the cover in the sidebar, you can read an excerpt and the first review.

Since this is a self-pub venture, I need reviews even more than usual.  If you’re willing to post a rating/review online, please drop me a note with your desired format and I’ll get you a review copy.

ALL PROCEEDS (I mean all – I’ve paid for the cover and editing out of my other royalties) in 4th quarter, 2012 will go to Rebuild Joplin.  (Remember the tornado?)

Why?  I have a personal connection to Joplin.  Early in our marriage, That Man and I lived there for nearly 3 years while I finished my undergraduate degree at Missouri Southern.  My beloved sister has lived in Joplin for more than ten years and also graduated from Missouri Southern.  I praise God every day that she wasn’t anywhere near the devastation area when the tornado hit, but her place of employment was completely wiped out.  She’s had to drive down familiar streets that look like a bomb went off and leveled the entire area.

Yes it’s been more than a year, but some parts of Joplin still look empty and broken.  Tomorrow, I’ll post some pictures we took just last month.  Along with some pictures of Mythos, our favorite restaurant that inspired Remy’s.

In the meantime, please help spread the word any way you can.  Thank you!

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Preparing My Zombie Story

I’ve been working on final updates to The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch, including formatting and a blurb.  I’m on track to release next week!

If you beta-read this book for me, can you drop me a note so I’m sure to include you in the acknowledgements?  Sometimes I lose track book to book and I don’t want to forget anyone who might have read it back in Nov. 2011 when I first finished it.

Does this blurb make you want to read the book? (It’s too long, so I’ll be trimming…)

The Zombie Billionaire’s Virgin Witch
A Zombie Category Romance
Because even zombies deserve a happily ever after.

Rich, gorgeous and powerful, renowned world-wide restaurateur Yiorgos Michelopoulos has it all. Except for the Midwestern ma-and-pa diner that somehow keeps winning the coveted fifth star over his own top-notch restaurants. The stubborn owner refuses to sell and beats him year after year. Infuriated, Yiorgos accepts the man’s risky bet, never knowing the secret to Remy’s success. Until it’s too late.

When he slips on the ring he won along with the diner, Yiorgos activates a curse that begins to turn him into a zombie.  Only someone of Remy’s blood can lift the curse, but the man died soon after losing his restaurant.  Luckily, he did have one lone daughter. The plump, frumpy kitchen witch ought to be easy pickings for a playboy like Yiorgos Michelopoulos. But one taste of her Death By Chocolate cake might just be the death of him.

Devastated by the loss of her father, their family signet ring and their restaurant, Claire Remy’s only hope for supporting her mother is to earn a teaching spot at the Wizard Council’s Academy.  Without the family signet ring, she must retain her virginity or lose her power entirely.

Which makes the gorgeous Greek a very, very dangerous man.